FRANCOIS SAGAT IS A “SAC DE DOUCHE”

Oh, he may be a chiseled hunk of a porn performer who is shockingly photogenic but in my eyes - after he was a no show last weekend at Philadelphia QFest – he is nothing but a soon-to-be-washed-up has-been. Bitter? Yes, I forked over $150 to have a one-on-one dinner (actually with 10 other people) with him before he made a personal appearance at the festival for his World Premiere screening of Sagat. But rumors circulated that his reported drug-addiction had him sprawled out on a Paris Metro stop (and as you can see in the photo he is furiously dreaming of his storied past.) He was simply too fucked up to board his USAir flight (or was it because it was a USAir flight?)
Will I ever jerk off to him again? Yea, probably, but I’ll always hold the grudge that he stood me up in Philly. And best of luck in rehab.
OPENING THE CLOSET TO THE BACHMANN DEN OF SECRETS
I can’t say I was shocked when self-hating, most certainly closeted, fey-speaking Marcus Bachmann re-entered the news (previous headlines of a week prior had him claiming homosexuals were like barbarians, prompting Cher’s threat of a boa-whipping) when former patient Andrew Ramirez went undercover to Marcus and his sexually-frustrated Michelle’s Minneapolis treatment center. There he recorded a Bachmann “therapist” declare that men’s eyes were designed by God to be attracted to women and that prayer would lead him from his chosen homo life to a straight one.
I’ll let the opinionated experts attack and defend but it got me thinking of all the films involving self-hating homosexuals and films that dealt with trying to change a normal gay man into a God-fearing, woman-fucking, baby-making heterosexual. The gay films which tackle this subject include:
But, I’m a Cheerleader
Save Me – Probably the most recognizable film on conversion therapy, Chad Allen and Robert Gant star as two gays in a conversion therapy camp who become involved with each other. Ummm, maybe conversion therapy doesn’t work.

Hard Pill - what if a pill could convert you from gay to straight? An interesting film (not that great though) about the idea. Would you take the pill?
“Cartman Sucks” episode of South Park - An incriminating photo of Eric Cartman’s in a homosexual encounter leads the cast into the world of childhood gay conversion therapy.

Fixing Frank - Dan Butler of “Fraser” fame stars as a homo-conversion therapist in this low budget stage-bound drama.
This Is What Love in Action Looks Like - probably the best film to watch if interested in conversion therapy. A documentary about a gay-conversion camp where parents send their homo-inflicted kids. A smart expose told by the teens who went through the camp.
WHO THE HELL IS JOE ORTON?

Joe Orton - a Lost Gay Icon?
I recently saw a small British film called Over the Edge. Its weird off-kilter sense of black comedy and unconventional gay characters reminded me of the plays and films of Joe Orton. Orton was an unbelievable trailblazer in 1960s British theatre. His irreverent, sexually-tinged, almost mean-spirited comedies should have been a flop in the socially conservative England, but instead his plays, “What the Butler Saw,” “Entertaining Mr. Sloane,” “The Ruffian on the Stair,” “Loot” were indeed absolutely shocking and controversial but huge hits with an audience ready to enter the modern era. At the height of his ascending fame, he was infamously murdered by his lover Kenneth Halliwell reportedly right before he was to meet the Beatles and present his script for their new film, Up Against It (which ends with all 4 Beatles naked in bed together.) His fame received a boost in the 1980s with the bio-film, Prick Up Your Ears with Gary Oldman playing the impish, sexually adventurous and prodigiously talented Orton. But ask a young homo today who is Joe Orton and 9 out of 10 times you’ll get a blank stare. What has happened to our gay history? This is really sad, because his work is still very current, just as outrageous and very funny today. Frustratingly, the only film adaptations of his plays are the classics, Entertaining Mr. Sloane, and Loot and BOTH are out of print in the USA. Even the film business has forgotten this amazing gay maverick.
REMARKABLE COMING-OF-AGE FILM

Young Love in NORTH SEA TEXAS
Coming-of Age dramas have been a staple of gay filmmaking for decades: This Special Friendship (1963), You Are Not Alone (1978), Beautiful Thing (1996) are just a few classics of this genre. But I’ve come across a really special one recently and oddly, one that is not playing any of the gay film festivals this summer: North Seas Texas, a Dutch film by Bavo Defurne. The simple story follows Pim from his childhood to his teenage years. He lives with his fun-loving (meaning boozing and philandering) mom on the seaside and has from his earliest years, has same sex feelings. As a quiet, blond teen he falls for his best friend Mario, a dark-haired extrovert. Their shifting dynamics forced by Mario’s interest in women increase tensions. A surprising ending make this a film to see. Where, I am not sure yet.
GAY CINEMA AND THE ASIAN NUDE MALE

Scud's newest film: Love Actually...Sucks
Male nudity in cinema has been around since the silent film era, dying out with the Hayes Code and re-appearing in the sexually wild 1960s and the decadent ’70s. And when I say nudity, it usually means ass and torso shots since full frontal of male actors is still pretty rare. And then when it comes to Asian men in gay cinema and their full nudity, that is even rarer – that is until Hong Kong filmmaker Scud came on the scene. He has made four films so far and all feature frontal nudity: City Without Baseball, Permanent Residence and his most recent films – Amphetamine and Love Actually…Sucks. The men are gorgeous and are repeatedly seen in full frontal, wonderful. Will he start a trend?
A TRANS FILM GAY MEN WILL LIKE?

Cute FTM Fall for macho Gay guy in ROMEOS

DO HANDJOBS COUNT?

That question and a few more (How about a blowjob? Kissing?) on how far a straight guy can safely go before he enters homoland. No some would say just checking out a guy’s ass, or peeking at some dude’s dick in the gym showers is tantamount to being a full time member of the Friends of Dorothy.
With this simple premise in hand, David Lewis wrote and directed a new gay comedy titled, Longhorns. Set in a 1970s Texan university dorm, the story follows the sexual shenanigans of a bunch of students – all of whom are straight – but all of whom help each other out when the need arises…hey, no problem there. But one student begins to think he just might be a fag when his male-on-male fantasies, his eagerness to go down on his buddies, him wanting to kiss a buddy and the last straw…becoming interested in the only openly gay guy on campus. Very funny comedy to check out on the festival circuit this summer and then on DVD/VOD later this year.
FUN NEW GAY HORROR FLICK

Flesh-Eating Zombies with the Taste for Gay Blood
The Film Series that REFUSES TO DIE!
Sequels don’t come naturally for gay films – most are independent productions that barely if ever make their money back, but Michael Shoel, owner of Ariztical, a gay/lesbian film distribution company has defied odds with his Eating Out films. The first one, Eating Out, was a hilariously sexy romp and was quickly followed by Eating Out: Sloppy Seconds and Eating Out: All You Can Eat - and the sequels were not half bad. Now, Eating Out – Drama Camp will receive its World Premiere screening July 8 at the Philadelphia QFest. The film, directed by Q Allan Brocka, who directed and wrote the original Eating Out, hopefully will be just as funny and male flesh-obsessed as the previous one. And there is another one on the way – they made 2 films at the same time, so expect the 5th installment to arrive at the end of the year.
CAN SEAN PAUL LOCKHART MAKE THE TRANSITION?

Sean Paul Lockhart, nee Brent Corrigan
